The second part of our journey lead us to Portage High School. We were met by a counselor of the school and walked up to the second story (did I mention the school is huge). Gail Thomas, my personal representative in NW Indiana and marketing director, Timothy Reeves, my film and technical director, and I, executive director of STITCH all met together. We all sat in a circle and I asked for everyone to share their story and a little about themselves.
During this time, some talked about love and life, while others talked about physical and mental abuse, rape, someone had a friend who comitted suicide, and I could feel the hurt and pain just flowing out of them. As we moved forward, I asked how many of them have been bullied of harrassed in some way and almost everyone raised their hand. I was shocked by the amounts of pain they all faced on a day-to-day basis. My heart goes out to these students. I found myself wanting to cry out and hug each and every one of them as they shared their personal stories. The courage some took in telling their story, in front of a group of people was nothing short of astonishing.
In hearing their stories, flashes came back from my own past connecting me on a deep level with their emotional scars. I remembered my thoughts prior to attempting sucide and how lost and unconnected I felt. I was angry toward the people who made my life miserable, fear of people discovering my sexuality, scared of losing my loved ones once they found out I was gay, lonley for keeping my life a secret, and helpless not knowing where to go and who would understand.
I can only hope, I showed them, I no longer feel this way. My life is now full of love and friends even after losing my family in death. I have gained life-long friendships that I consider more than friends, but family because they have always been there for me through the thick and thin. I hope the students see their support group as a healing place where there are people around them who care and believe they matter. I know this because I am one of these people.
I also hope that they see how important each and every one of them is in our community. Every single one of them has something to offer society and to the future of our society. I have learned from them as I hope they learned from me. I do not deny, I do know everything and I am not always right, but the more I hear, the more I learn, the better equipped I become to help others. The stories and life experiences they shared, will definitely help me in aiding others. I want to see great things come out of this group of students, and in fact, I expect it.
I did not just feel and see pain when I entered into the room. I saw leadership, action, and a will to make a great community and a difference in the world. I love this because I know how difficult it is to be a part of something others in the school and community frown upon, but such a group is needed to offer support. They have two wonderful counselors who care very much about them and want these students to succeed and I am so happy they all have an outlet. Well, they now have three people they can turn to. I will be more than happy to do whatever I can in helping out anyone who needs me in some way. I chose this line of work, not for money, not for fame, but to help others. I find this way helps me to keep moving forward and to heal myself as well as others. I am so happy I was invited and was able to meet this wonderful group and I hope I connected and helped in some way.
This concluded my trip to the north. Later that night, I drove home thinking about everything I had learned and coming up with new innovative ideas to help them around. I do know that I will be in touch with the counselors more to be giving them information. I hope they do the same. I will be back in town in Aril for the Day of Silence and am looking forward to seeing everyone again.

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